


Draw my heart out from my chest

by aphrodite_mine



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-07 16:36:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1906068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aphrodite_mine/pseuds/aphrodite_mine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Whatever," Sarah says. "Winners choose the movie, and Cos and I want unscientifically accurate zombies, so that'll give you plenty of opportunities to jump scared into Beth's arms." </p><p>Alison has nothing to say to <i>that</i>, so the rest of the walk to Beth's dorm is a quiet one, Beth's hand silently slipping into Alison's halfway there. Alison squeezes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Draw my heart out from my chest

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [Ace Beth Week](http://acebethweek.tumblr.com), 2014.

Cosima and Sarah have totally obliterated trivia night despite being _noticeably_ stoned and generally not giving a shit. Alison puts on a cheerful face about it, congratulating them and even stiffly shaking Sarah's hand. 

"I don't know how, but I swear you two cheated," Beth says, taking a decidedly different tactic.

"Dude," Cosima says, stifling laughter. "Do you know how much _effort_ that would take? Why can't you just accept that I am-- that we are superior knowledge maesters, Beth?"

Beth shoots Cosima a look at clearly reads _Because look at you_ , though the message must get lost because Cosima and Sarah just laugh, Sarah tugging Cosima close and squeezing her around the middle. 

The streetlamp outside of the commons flickers on. "Regardless, we should probably get going before it gets dark." Alison clears her throat and turns her back on them, walking purposefully down the sidewalk.

"What's your hurry, Hendrix? Not enough snuggle time at trivia?"

"I was _focused_ , Sarah," Alison answers, snaps, really, "on the game."

"Whatever," Sarah says. "Winners choose the movie, and Cos and I want unscientifically accurate zombies, so that'll give you plenty of opportunities to jump scared into Beth's arms." 

Alison has nothing to say to _that_ , so the rest of the walk to Beth's dorm is a quiet one, Beth's hand silently slipping into Alison's halfway there. Alison squeezes.

*

Something is already growling on screen when Alison returns from the common room with microwaved popcorn and a bowl of ice for their drinks. "Thanks Ali," Beth calls in greeting. They've plopped into their usual setup -- Cosima and Sarah on the floor, one's head on the other's shoulder, and Beth and Alison getting automatic dibs on Beth's bottom bunk. (Angie's bunk is officially off limits after Cosima somehow managed to leave a pinched-off roach on her pillow and only Beth's quick thinking kept them all from being expelled. Smoking is also, coincidentally, now off limits.) Alison leaves the ice bowl on Beth's desk and sets the popcorn in front of Cosima and Sarah.

They're kind of a motley crew, with Sarah just returning from a semester abroad, and their widely disparate majors, but apparently bonds forged in orientation really do stick and here it is, mid-junior year, and the four of them (now with bonus budding romances) are as close -- closer -- as ever.

Course, that doesn't mean there aren't bumps in the road.

"Popcorn?" Alison offers, getting comfy, sitting close-but-not-touching. "I made the extra buttery you like."

Beth lights up, visible in the bright flashes of action from the movie. She grabs a huge handful from between their friends and stuffs it all, inelegantly, into her mouth. "'Fanks!" she says, belatedly, managing at least not to spray her girlfriend with popcorn bits.

Alison pats Beth on the thigh and smiles. 

*

By the amount of undead growls and screams, they've reached the movie's climax making it, apparently, the perfect time for Beth to lean over (scaring the _dickens_ out of Alison) and whisper "We could snuggle. If you want to."

After her heart starts again, Alison looks at Beth in the flickering light, trying to read her face. There's earnestness there, and maybe her eyes are… a little sad.

"You know I don't care about that, Beth," Alison says finally, whispering under the yelps of action. If Sarah and Cosima can hear them, they don't give any indication. After all, it would be a little rude to eavesdrop while kissing your girlfriend's neck or having it kissed. Also: zombies.

"But earlier--"

"Sarah is an idiot," Alison hisses, "who thrives on not minding her own darn business."

Beth only plucks at her comforter, frowning. "You've never pressured me. About any of that."

Alison raises an eyebrow, taken aback. "Do you _want_ me to?"

The zombie horde groans with renewed intensity at the scent of fresh blood, and Beth surges forward, cupping Alison's face with both hands and kissing her roughly on the mouth. Alison, as startled as she is, cannot help but respond, moving her lips and scooting closer. Then, as quickly as it started, the kiss is over. And Beth still looks sad. Alison struggles to catch her breath.

"You deserve more."

Alison shakes her head, drawing her fingers to her mouth. "No, Beth--"

"You deserve kisses and cuddles and not--" Beth cuts herself off, gesturing to herself, her hand making a sweeping motion that encompasses the two of them on her bed. "And you _want_ that stuff. I know you do. _You're_ not the weird one, here, Ali--"

Alison grabs her hand, stopping the sweep."You are _not_ weird, Beth," she says, forgetting to whisper in her intensity. "You're just…" Alison exhales, her eyebrows knitted together. "You're the person I love, okay?" She looks down, placing Beth's hand between her two, tracing imaginary lines down Beth's wrist. "Not any of that."

The remaining humans let out a war whoop. The threat has been vanquished.

"That was, in fact, _extremely_ scientifically inaccurate," Cosima murmurs, and Beth uses the distraction to quickly swipe a hand across her eyes.

"Yes, but you loved it," Sarah grins. "Brat."

"It's been a _lovely_ evening," Alison says, quickly hopping down from the bed and clasping her hands together. Hostess Alison is strangely just as good at wrapping things up as she is at party prep. "I'd offer you both another round of congratulations, but unfortunately, I doubt you'd believe me."

Sarah lets out a bark of laughter, getting to her feet and tugging Cosima up as well. "Right, well. I can tell when I'm no longer wanted," she teases. "Maybe you two'll kick our arses next time, yeah?"

Beth nods in the semi-dark of the ending credits. "Totally."

*

The DVD menu plays on repeat as Alison and Beth lie squished into Beth's twin bed. Their pinky fingers twist and un-twist in a slow, almost-rhythm. 

"You're right," Alison says, still quiet though they are alone.

"I am?"

"I do get jealous of them, sometimes. But… if I wanted to date Sarah, or Cosima, I would date them, wouldn't I?" Alison blunders on, heedless of the way she lifts Beth's hand with hers. "And I don't. I mean, I want you. Of _course_ I want you, but more than that, I want you to be happy. And safe." Alison squeezes Beth's hand. "I would hate myself so _effing_ much if I pushed you and ruined what we have."

Beth squeezes back. 

"I love you, Ali," she says, and really, that's all she needs to say.


End file.
